[DBSK/SJ] 5 Times HyukSu Were Caught Doing Questionable Things..., PG-13, Humor, HyukSu

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My stance on all drama remains the same, so please refrain from commenting about that here. Thank you kindly! Have some lulz instead?

{04/12} CHRISTMAS REQUESTS
for shinigamitabris ♥

5 Times HyukSu Were Caught Doing Questionable Things + 1 Time They Caught Someone Else
DBSK/Super Junior, Hyukjae/Junsu, PG-13, 890 words
In which Junsu and Hyukjae think they're hilarious, and Heechul does not.

(1)
"Is there a reason," Heechul's voice was all ice, "that you are standing over a pair of my shoes with a bag of marshmallows?"

Hyukjae looked up guiltily, knowing his red face gave him away.

Junsu only grinned, blithe and fearless as ever. "No reason at all, hyung," he lied through his teeth.

Heechul gave them a hard look before stalking off, long hair whipping over his shoulder.

They ended up putting the marshmallows in Yunho's shoes instead, and were rewarded with Yunho's undignified yelp as his feet sank into sticky squishiness, and Heechul's laughter.


(2)
"Lee Hyukjae," Yunho said and Hyukjae cringed. "Kim Junsu." Junsu had a defiant set to his jaw. Yunho shook his head at them, arms crossed. "I'm very disappointed in you."

But Donghae cries so easily, Hyukjae thought a little resentfully. And they hadn't meant it! It was only a joke.

"We apologized," Junsu argued.

Yunho sighed. "You're lucky I'm the one talking to you and not Heechul. He'd take off your heads."

"Heechul-hyung never thinks any of our pranks are funny," Hyukjae said glumly to Junsu later, as they stopped by a convenience shop to buy some Choco-pies to make it up to Donghae. They split the cost and headed back towards the SM building.

Junsu scowled. "He's just uptight because he got mistaken for Yunho's girlfriend again."


(3)
"Is that porn?" Changmin asked, sounding entirely too delighted.

"No!" Junsu yelped, and slammed his laptop closed. He waved his hands frantically at the youngest member, who was standing behind him with an infuriating smirk. "Look, I was just webcamming with Hyukjae - it's a project, we have these plans—" He stopped. "Get your mind out of the gutter."

"Webcam sex," Changmin said solemnly, "I see."

Junsu hung his head. "How much is it going to cost to keep this from the others?"

"Twenty bucks per interview to keep it from the public," Changmin grinned. "But nothing's keeping this from the others. I'm not about to pass up an opportunity to not be the one teased about his porn all the time."

Junsu couldn't blame him, even if he hated him. Hated him with a fierce and undying passion, because he'd also told Kibum, who'd told Heechul, who, according to Hyukjae, was never going to let the two of them live it down.


(4)
"No, seriously," said Junsu, eyeing Taemin with a speculative gleam. "He looks eerily like Heechul. Do you know what we could do with this?"

Clearly, years in Japan hadn't dulled Junsu's love for pranks. Hyukjae made a big show of acquiescing to Junsu's demands, but he was already plotting in his head, grinning broadly. There was something comforting about how familiar their friendship was, despite months apart at a time.

"What is the matter with you fucktwits?" Heechul shouted at them when they kidnapped Taemin and dragged him into the rented Dong Bang apartments.

"Why are you here," Junsu despaired. "You don't even live here. Go home."

Heechul got off the couch from where he and Yunho had been watching TV, making gestures of death at Junsu. Hyukjae covered his face with his hands. It had been nice knowing Junsu as long as he'd had... They'd had a good friendship. Hyukjae would write him a good eulogy.

Taemin stepped between Heechul and Junsu and looked at his legs. Then he looked up at Heechul, frowning a little. "Does this skirt make my butt look big?"

"Is he supposed to be me?" Heechul finally found voice to ask, outraged.

Yunho came up to them and patted Heechul soothingly on the back. "It's okay, hyung," he said, because he was everything good and gracious and saving Junsu and Hyukjae's lives and Hyukjae loved him forever and ever, amen, "you look better in a skirt."


(5)
Heechul opened the closet door and said, "Oh for fuck's sake." He closed it again and shouted, "Get a real room."

The mop hit Hyukjae on the back of the head as he sighed, mournfully. Then Junsu twisted his wrist and Hyukjae gasped and resumed not caring.


(+1)
"C'mon, let me show you my new laptop," Hyukjae said excitedly as he dragged Junsu through the dorms to his room. "I didn't even let Donghae touch it yet! I was afraid he'd break it - he has a sucky history with technology, you know how it is." He threw open his door and stopped dead. Junsu ran into him. They both stared.

"Fuck, fuck," Junsu said, scrabbling out of the room, hands clapped to his eyes. "I've gone blind!"

Heechul hitched one leg higher on Yunho's hips and freed one hand from Yunho's hair to flutter his fingers at Hyukjae. "Hi," he said brightly. "Hope you don't mind that I'm using your bed. Hankyung's in his and Donghae's got Kibum locked in his."

"W-What about your room?" Hyukjae stuttered as he felt his face heat up. He couldn't quite look either Heechul or Yunho in the eye.

"Well, Teukie had a coronary last time and banned me from bringing boys back to the room so..."

"I hate my life," Hyukjae said to Junsu as they commiserated on the couch in the common area. Junsu wound an arm around him in horrified sympathy. Hyukjae's head fell onto his shoulder as he moped. "I wish I were in your band."

--

Started/Finished: 2009.12.23

Notes: Tabris, I hope you don't mind too terribly that I sneaked in HoRella and also mentions of SHINee, whom I know you don't know too well. Hope you laughed and enjoyed this regardless! Happy hols~