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chineseinkThere's not really a point to or excuse for this. Fandom is stressing me out. Life is stressing me out. Sometimes I write when I'm stressed. Sometimes I write porn, I don't know. This may also be masquerading as an excuse for me to ruminate on (via fic) the extreme awesome that is CinHae. Extremely NSFW.
The Power Games We Play
Super Junior (M), Heechul/Donghae, Heechul/everyone, NC-17, 1620 words
Sucking cock is not just about liking cock (though Heechul does, very much): it's also about power dynamics.
Heechul likes sucking cock. He likes the weight and taste of it, heavy on his tongue and salty-bitter in his mouth, with his lips stretched wide and pulled back over his teeth. He likes how his knees will ache later, how his jaw will throb and his throat will be tender, corporeal memories of having a dick fucking his mouth raw. Some people might judge Heechul if they knew, but the only people who know are the ones who've got their cocks thrusting in and out of his mouth, their hips in his grip and his face in their crotch. They've got no room to judge, too busy moaning and bitching, gasping out orders and complaints like they have a say in what Heechul does with his tongue. They really don't.
That's what Heechul likes best about sucking cock, really: the power he has to pull back and breathe, hot and damp, over Kyuhyun's dick, or flutter his tongue along the length of Hankyung's. He gets to slide his hands over hot flesh, slick with spit and precome, teasing and taunting until Siwon forgets himself and curses. Until Sungmin's clenching his fists in Heechul's hair and then apologizing, begging. Heechul likes it, loves it, when Donghae's eyes go dark and his mouth falls open, whining in the back of his throat as he pushes his hips forward so the head of his cock skims past Heechul's lips.
He's not really gay, not really into getting fisted and jerked off later - not by anyone else, he can handle himself - and sometimes sucking dick is enough, because that's really all a game of power play. That's the heady rush Heechul is looking for as he works his throat and swallows down a hot rush of come, licking his lips like a satisfied cat after (the cat who got the cream he thinks, feeling clever). There's nothing quite like it, nothing like ending up sweaty and bruised, content with the knowledge he's leaving behind a fucked out band member still trembling and dazed. Sometimes when he's by himself he'll slide a hand into his underwear and fuck his fist - caught in the memories and feeling the lingering aches, remembering the way Kangin babbles or Eeteuk merely grunts - and then he's arching off the bed as he spills all over his hand. His head's thrown back and his mouth's wide open with the ghost-weight that chokes off his cry, and he comes down still shaking and wired and pleased. There's nothing that gives you the upper hand quite like having someone's dick in your mouth and Heechul loves it.
"You're messed up," Kyuhyun tells him bluntly and Heechul just retaliates the next time with a hint of teeth. Kyuhyun winces but his cock jumps in Heechul's mouth and Heechul thinks he actually kind of likes it. Makes his point invalid, as far as Heechul's concerned. Cheeky brat.
"Hyung," Siwon always says, looking flushed and guilty and torn for days afterwards. Heechul knows he's praying, repenting, but it doesn't matter what Siwon thinks because he's always back. He's never once managed to say no to Heechul and his clever mouth.
Eeteuk never says anything, just avoids eye contact for a while before he forgets himself. He's always been the type to bottle things up inside, though, and Heechul can't really be bothered with dealing with his issues. Eeteuk's full up on issues and none of them are Heechul's concern as long as he still gets to suck Eeteuk's dick when he wants - and he does. Eeteuk's got a nice dick.
Thing is, Heechul likes sucking dick but he's not a slut - he gets pretty offended at the implication. He likes sucking dick and he's damned good at it, but he's picky about who he lets in his mouth - about who he trusts enough to be fucking his face when they lose their inhibitions and all their blood's drained from their brain to their dick. So Heechul's not even doing all of the band - dude, fourteen other guys? No. Heechul gets selective. He's never even gone near Henry's dick, fuck, that would be awkward and weird, when the kid's so young and Heechul can barely even communicate with him on a functional level. He's not about to shove his face in that crotch. And Heechul likes Ryeowook but, dear lord, not that way. Somehow it's okay screwing with Siwon's religion and head but Heechul thinks even he would feel like shit if he started fucking with Ryeowook.
It's not any one distinct thing - some people he's just not interested in, some people it's just too weird with. It really does come down to some element of trust, and maybe that's why Heechul's favorites are Donghae and Hankyung and Kibum. If he ever sat down to analyze it - and Heechul wouldn't ever, he'd rather be enjoying the moment or playing with his cats or messing around online than wasting his time overthinking - Heechul figures it'd probably be because their dynamic with him includes an element of him liking them enough to let them boss him around. It means that he can get his back when he's got kind of an important bit of them shoved down his throat.
Kibum, the fucker, gets all longsuffering and eye-rolling and makes all those comments under his breath and Heechul likes him enough to let him get away it. Likes him enough to be persuaded to show up at his boring-ass movie premiere and suck him off in a ritzy bathroom later, not even baring his teeth when Kibum's cold fingers find their way through his hair and tug on his scalp. He gets his revenge when Kibum can barely stand later, stumbling out and forcing a smile at the director and well-wishers like he's all right, didn't just come hard enough to see stars or anything. Heechul disappears into the crowd, smirking.
And Hankyung - man, Heechul takes pride and full responsibility for corrupting him, making him wicked and terrible and interesting. And yet none of that can fully obscure the innate good-heartedness inside, the core of the innocent and earnest country boy thrown into a whole new world that didn't manage to stain him completely. Hankyung is such a mama's boy, so determined to be a good upstanding citizen - Siwon clings to him, ever hopeful to undo some of the damage Heechul's already laid in stone - but Heechul likes him a little wild. Knows that he's willing to bend over backwards sometimes to bring that out, because it's good for Hankyung to be more confident and cocky and bitching at Heechul in a stream of broken Korean and Chinese when he's got Heechul on his knees. Heechul's always had a soft spot for Chinese boys anyway.
But Donghae, Donghae is Heechul's favorite and, yeah, he knows it. The whole fucking world probably knows it and Heechul sometimes gets embarrassed about it, thinks he's being a little too soppy about the whole thing. It's not like he doesn't have other favorites, after all - Hongki, Sulli, Jonghyun, whatever. It's not quite the same though. He's not really into fucking with the others, at least not beyond a figurative sense where he gets to boss them around and they laugh at him and indulge him and, yeah, whatever. The dynamic he's got going on with his favorites works for him, for them, and that's why they're his favorites.
Donghae is on this whole other level that Heechul doesn't examine too closely and just accepts. Because Donghae loves him so unabashedly, widest fucking smile and brightest fucking eyes, reading him stupid love letters with tears in his voice and clutching at his hand whenever he's really, truly upset. But then he turns around and curses Heechul out, loses his temper right back at Heechul like he's not afraid of the consequences. He calms Heechul down, makes him laugh, decides to grow out their hair together and then cheats on him and Heechul doesn't even care. Donghae is all over the other members, playing and dancing and being so very Donghae, and Heechul doesn't really need confirmation that he's just as special to Donghae, not really-- But there's nothing quite as gratifying as having Donghae's full attention and knowing that, yeah, Donghae is on this whole other level for Heechul but vice fucking versa. No one else gets Donghae's eyes blown wide like that, almost all black, as his fingers dig into Heechul's shoulders and his panting grows ragged and needy, chest heaving up and down as he watches Heechul slowly feed Donghae's cock into his mouth. He takes it slow and builds it up, drives Donghae crazy and feels damned smug when Donghae comes apart in his hands, in his mouth, shuddering and wrecked like his bones have up and melted away.
Heechul's not really into the whole mutual gratification thing - it's just about sucking cock like a pro and knowing he has that kind of control, it's not supposed to be like an emotional bonding moment - but when it comes to Donghae, it's a little different. Just a little. Heechul likes the swollen look of Donghae's mouth, bitten and red, likes the sweat collecting in the hollow of his throat, just like with everyone else. But he lingers a little longer when it's Donghae, doesn't mind so much the sleepy smile Donghae gives him or the soft sound of his name, Heechul, stripped of honorifics and terrifyingly intimate, slipping between his lips.
It's a subtle little shift in power and, with Donghae, Heechul finds himself not quite so reluctant to give it up.
--
Started/Finished: 2010.04.20
The Power Games We Play
Super Junior (M), Heechul/Donghae, Heechul/everyone, NC-17, 1620 words
Sucking cock is not just about liking cock (though Heechul does, very much): it's also about power dynamics.
Heechul likes sucking cock. He likes the weight and taste of it, heavy on his tongue and salty-bitter in his mouth, with his lips stretched wide and pulled back over his teeth. He likes how his knees will ache later, how his jaw will throb and his throat will be tender, corporeal memories of having a dick fucking his mouth raw. Some people might judge Heechul if they knew, but the only people who know are the ones who've got their cocks thrusting in and out of his mouth, their hips in his grip and his face in their crotch. They've got no room to judge, too busy moaning and bitching, gasping out orders and complaints like they have a say in what Heechul does with his tongue. They really don't.
That's what Heechul likes best about sucking cock, really: the power he has to pull back and breathe, hot and damp, over Kyuhyun's dick, or flutter his tongue along the length of Hankyung's. He gets to slide his hands over hot flesh, slick with spit and precome, teasing and taunting until Siwon forgets himself and curses. Until Sungmin's clenching his fists in Heechul's hair and then apologizing, begging. Heechul likes it, loves it, when Donghae's eyes go dark and his mouth falls open, whining in the back of his throat as he pushes his hips forward so the head of his cock skims past Heechul's lips.
He's not really gay, not really into getting fisted and jerked off later - not by anyone else, he can handle himself - and sometimes sucking dick is enough, because that's really all a game of power play. That's the heady rush Heechul is looking for as he works his throat and swallows down a hot rush of come, licking his lips like a satisfied cat after (the cat who got the cream he thinks, feeling clever). There's nothing quite like it, nothing like ending up sweaty and bruised, content with the knowledge he's leaving behind a fucked out band member still trembling and dazed. Sometimes when he's by himself he'll slide a hand into his underwear and fuck his fist - caught in the memories and feeling the lingering aches, remembering the way Kangin babbles or Eeteuk merely grunts - and then he's arching off the bed as he spills all over his hand. His head's thrown back and his mouth's wide open with the ghost-weight that chokes off his cry, and he comes down still shaking and wired and pleased. There's nothing that gives you the upper hand quite like having someone's dick in your mouth and Heechul loves it.
"You're messed up," Kyuhyun tells him bluntly and Heechul just retaliates the next time with a hint of teeth. Kyuhyun winces but his cock jumps in Heechul's mouth and Heechul thinks he actually kind of likes it. Makes his point invalid, as far as Heechul's concerned. Cheeky brat.
"Hyung," Siwon always says, looking flushed and guilty and torn for days afterwards. Heechul knows he's praying, repenting, but it doesn't matter what Siwon thinks because he's always back. He's never once managed to say no to Heechul and his clever mouth.
Eeteuk never says anything, just avoids eye contact for a while before he forgets himself. He's always been the type to bottle things up inside, though, and Heechul can't really be bothered with dealing with his issues. Eeteuk's full up on issues and none of them are Heechul's concern as long as he still gets to suck Eeteuk's dick when he wants - and he does. Eeteuk's got a nice dick.
Thing is, Heechul likes sucking dick but he's not a slut - he gets pretty offended at the implication. He likes sucking dick and he's damned good at it, but he's picky about who he lets in his mouth - about who he trusts enough to be fucking his face when they lose their inhibitions and all their blood's drained from their brain to their dick. So Heechul's not even doing all of the band - dude, fourteen other guys? No. Heechul gets selective. He's never even gone near Henry's dick, fuck, that would be awkward and weird, when the kid's so young and Heechul can barely even communicate with him on a functional level. He's not about to shove his face in that crotch. And Heechul likes Ryeowook but, dear lord, not that way. Somehow it's okay screwing with Siwon's religion and head but Heechul thinks even he would feel like shit if he started fucking with Ryeowook.
It's not any one distinct thing - some people he's just not interested in, some people it's just too weird with. It really does come down to some element of trust, and maybe that's why Heechul's favorites are Donghae and Hankyung and Kibum. If he ever sat down to analyze it - and Heechul wouldn't ever, he'd rather be enjoying the moment or playing with his cats or messing around online than wasting his time overthinking - Heechul figures it'd probably be because their dynamic with him includes an element of him liking them enough to let them boss him around. It means that he can get his back when he's got kind of an important bit of them shoved down his throat.
Kibum, the fucker, gets all longsuffering and eye-rolling and makes all those comments under his breath and Heechul likes him enough to let him get away it. Likes him enough to be persuaded to show up at his boring-ass movie premiere and suck him off in a ritzy bathroom later, not even baring his teeth when Kibum's cold fingers find their way through his hair and tug on his scalp. He gets his revenge when Kibum can barely stand later, stumbling out and forcing a smile at the director and well-wishers like he's all right, didn't just come hard enough to see stars or anything. Heechul disappears into the crowd, smirking.
And Hankyung - man, Heechul takes pride and full responsibility for corrupting him, making him wicked and terrible and interesting. And yet none of that can fully obscure the innate good-heartedness inside, the core of the innocent and earnest country boy thrown into a whole new world that didn't manage to stain him completely. Hankyung is such a mama's boy, so determined to be a good upstanding citizen - Siwon clings to him, ever hopeful to undo some of the damage Heechul's already laid in stone - but Heechul likes him a little wild. Knows that he's willing to bend over backwards sometimes to bring that out, because it's good for Hankyung to be more confident and cocky and bitching at Heechul in a stream of broken Korean and Chinese when he's got Heechul on his knees. Heechul's always had a soft spot for Chinese boys anyway.
But Donghae, Donghae is Heechul's favorite and, yeah, he knows it. The whole fucking world probably knows it and Heechul sometimes gets embarrassed about it, thinks he's being a little too soppy about the whole thing. It's not like he doesn't have other favorites, after all - Hongki, Sulli, Jonghyun, whatever. It's not quite the same though. He's not really into fucking with the others, at least not beyond a figurative sense where he gets to boss them around and they laugh at him and indulge him and, yeah, whatever. The dynamic he's got going on with his favorites works for him, for them, and that's why they're his favorites.
Donghae is on this whole other level that Heechul doesn't examine too closely and just accepts. Because Donghae loves him so unabashedly, widest fucking smile and brightest fucking eyes, reading him stupid love letters with tears in his voice and clutching at his hand whenever he's really, truly upset. But then he turns around and curses Heechul out, loses his temper right back at Heechul like he's not afraid of the consequences. He calms Heechul down, makes him laugh, decides to grow out their hair together and then cheats on him and Heechul doesn't even care. Donghae is all over the other members, playing and dancing and being so very Donghae, and Heechul doesn't really need confirmation that he's just as special to Donghae, not really-- But there's nothing quite as gratifying as having Donghae's full attention and knowing that, yeah, Donghae is on this whole other level for Heechul but vice fucking versa. No one else gets Donghae's eyes blown wide like that, almost all black, as his fingers dig into Heechul's shoulders and his panting grows ragged and needy, chest heaving up and down as he watches Heechul slowly feed Donghae's cock into his mouth. He takes it slow and builds it up, drives Donghae crazy and feels damned smug when Donghae comes apart in his hands, in his mouth, shuddering and wrecked like his bones have up and melted away.
Heechul's not really into the whole mutual gratification thing - it's just about sucking cock like a pro and knowing he has that kind of control, it's not supposed to be like an emotional bonding moment - but when it comes to Donghae, it's a little different. Just a little. Heechul likes the swollen look of Donghae's mouth, bitten and red, likes the sweat collecting in the hollow of his throat, just like with everyone else. But he lingers a little longer when it's Donghae, doesn't mind so much the sleepy smile Donghae gives him or the soft sound of his name, Heechul, stripped of honorifics and terrifyingly intimate, slipping between his lips.
It's a subtle little shift in power and, with Donghae, Heechul finds himself not quite so reluctant to give it up.
--
Started/Finished: 2010.04.20
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